depression- cure, symptoms, and coping

We all had a friend who used to stay aloof, do not talk much and has severe mood swings, at one time in our life. As we grow old, during our high school and graduation, we have seen classmates who are sad and lost interest in life, feeling empty and hopeless. Some like me might have experienced it in varying shades and degrees themselves. The recent deaths of Pratyusha Banerjee and Jiah Khan has brought the light back to the uncomfortable question of extreme pressure to perform, not able to handle, either-failure or success.
Sadness and disappointments in life and going through rough phase is normal, but if the phase continues for long, it is called as depression. Although the real depression is much more then sadness and emptiness, the symptoms of major depression include loss of appetite, tiredness, addiction to alcohol and stuff, most importantly lost of interest from life and things you once used to enjoy. There are some clear signs of someone struggling from life and depression.
7 SIGNS OF DEPRESSION:
• The person cannot concentrate at work and personal life, gets irritated at small things, restless and even violent during any argument
• Loss of interest from all things the person liked, most important of it socializing.
• The feeling of worthlessness and aimlessness, is one of the most easily visible symptom, where person cut from all near and dear ones.
• Loss of appetite and weight, and interest of grooming specifically in females can be seen, while others may start over eating to the extreme.
• The person feels he is responsible for every wrong happening in his life or anyone connected to him.
• Suicidal thoughts and attempts to end life in cases of persistent and long term depression.
• Fear of bringing disrepute and ill name to family and its legacy in society by his/her past action or unethical act.

The last point can trigger suicide even before a person fall into depression, as he tries to end life in the heat of the moment.

The only way of bringing someone out of depression is being with the person, and providing him unconditional emotional support as he is weak in the head, and depression is all in mind. The friends of the person should interact with him more and should not leave him in the middle of road, because of his changed behavior and extreme mood swings. People with suicidal tendencies talk about harming themselves, calling friends and relatives to say goodbye, giving away their expensive stuff to friends and cousins.

Loneliness and lack of support from family and peers is one of the most important causes of depression, although depression because of financial stress, substance abuse and relationship problems can best be treated by medical and psychological experts. Parents have to detect the symptoms and causes by observing the pattern and should not force anyone to go to a psychologist as it may lead person to start avoiding such people. Friends and family should indulge the person, make him know that how much they appreciate the patient and their mere existence make them happy.

WHAT IF YOU ARE SUFFERING FROM DEPRESSION?

I can answer this question well, because I have seen people close to me in clinical depression, maniac depression also known as bipolar depression, in which person is over-happy for a week and extremely depressed in the next.
I, myself to an extent have gone through some minor depression for a month or two, 3 years back and can say it with confidence, there is always a door to come out of it.

The only thing one has to learn is if you have more than 2 of the above mentioned symptoms for more than a month, you probably are in early stages of depression. As causes of depression are different, so are the cure. What works for one person to get out of it may not work for other. The best approach is to change the lifestyle, confide in someone you trust, and don’t leave yourself alone as isolation may fuel depression. If it is severe, there is nothing wrong in getting medical help. Therapy and antidepressant, along with counseling can work wonders, and fastens the process of recovery. Manage your emotions and stress well, understand the basic fact that – the only constant in life is change. Remember what P.B. Shelly said–“ If winter comes, can spring be far behind?”

Try to read motivational books and look at people who have suffered and fought and came out glorious. Remember what legends have said to inspire us to bear the pain.
A pearl is a beautiful thing that is produced by an injured life. It is the tear from the injury of the oyster. The treasure of our being in this world is also produced by an injured life. If we had not been wounded, if we had not been injured, then we will not produce the pearl.”– Stephen Hoeller.

DEPRESSION BY STATSTICS:

• Depression affects 121 million people worldwide. Severe depression can lead to suicides and is responsible for 8.5 million deaths every year.

• 80 percent of people who have clinical depression are not taking any specific treatment to cure it.

• The number of patients with depression increases by 20 percent every year.

• Depression is most probable in age group of 42 – 64 years. Overall women are twice more prone to depression then men.

• In India, as per a survey in 2011, 36 percent of the population suffers from depression.

Before taking the extreme step, think about those who are alive just to see you smile. Don’t take their purpose of life away from them.

If Pratyusha, would have thought of her million fans who loved her unconditionally. If she would have confided in her parents or friends, and have stood against her abusive live in partner, without thinking about how society will judge her, for having 3 consecutive failed relationships; she would have been alive today.

Advertisements

travel diaries

Explored the traveler in me few years back. This blog is for all those who want to get a true experience and want to get an idea of what the vibe of a place is… what should not be missed. I am one of those who do not travel on tight budget, so those who love a bit of luxury, and some holiday pampering – watch this space for more

post

The journey of pain

With all the pain,

the humiliation deep inside..

I kept going….

With all the broken desires, messed up life..

I kept going…

 

Until a day

I choked up to my lungs, and it seems,

instead of blood in my veins,

It was all tears that flowed inside, tearing me apart…

 

I cried beneath the pillows

behind closed doors..

While the world sleeps, and the hands of clock kept moving

while the time stood still….

I was passing to the oblivion like an aging star….

 

With all my secrets,

which i took to my grave…

None talked, None shared…..

 

With the end coming near, I thought with all my might

Did i ever lived??

As my soul departed to space

I

finally rest my case…

 

 

 

 

 

 

the Modis and the Shahs- the end of Gandhis…

narendra-modi-shah_650x400_51489312929For So long as the distant memory can remember, the Gandhis have been an integral part of the politics that we saw in India. How good they were at their job may be debatable but it is disappointing to see them to move towards the verge of non existence. the politics which was inclined towards inclusion and distributing freebies was certainly better then hatred and passion for the Ram Mandir, which is exponentially higher then that at Advani’s time may yet not be a thing to be worried about.

The rise of Modi politics and Amit Shah as the master strategist is a killer combination. More literally killer! the reason being the tough stands and emotional appeals directly to the public, probably taught by the veteran Smriti Irani are impeccable. The art of deceiving and mud slinging and using anecdotes from past century comes naturally to Modi. For every failure – congress is to be blamed. For every success , we are the heros. Remember Modi going to an extent of saying Aadhar has its origin with Vajpayee and taking credit for GST, are some masterstrokes the couple has played well.

The road ahead seems to be filled with roses, but there may be bumps, which are unnoticeable as of now. The Gujrat marginal victory was an example. Getting Nagaland, and other small states may be an achievement, they can sure boast, but Rajesthan seems out of reach, so does Karnatka. In general election in 15 months, thry have nothing to show. They may fool people again and the chances are high, they will. But not with the grandeur with which they were able to pull it off in 2014. The regional parties are upset and they are waiting to pull their masks off and attack with such ferocity they Modi will be shocked.

Padmavati – the queen of controversies…or curbing artistic freedom?

For so long as, we as citizens of a country, has the time to sit back and take offense, we are not going to be great. There have been many instances in the past, that has stirred the imagination of the country, concerned with the field of cinema and artist and people giving certificates to how far creative freedom go, when it comes to history? Thanks to the mainstream media, which have been blown the Deepika Padukone starrer Padmavati controversy, out of proportion, in a desperate need for gasping some TRP’s. I also fortunately had the opportunity to watch some utterly low level high Trp news shows, which ran prime times on going to her palace at night to listen to her anklets and her soul wandering in courtyards for revenge.

At the end, all I can say is, in a country as diverse as India, with so many people from all over the place, everyone can get offended at the way their community or religion or sect is being depicted, or projected or ridiculed in the magnificent opera called cinema. I, being a Sikh, should be most vocal and supportive of the actions of Karni sena and the likes, who are getting violent each day on Sanjay Leela Bansalis depiction of their queen mother whom they worship. As a community , or a sect, no other religion has been projected of people with low IQ, horribly dresses, wearing all colours of rainbows in their attire, and being stupidly funny as SARDARS. But the one thing I want to add here is, no one can bring you down, if you dont give importance to them. We refuse to react and become violent, and finally they stopped.

Well, I wont contest the theory, which says that filmmakers are getting benefits of free and cheap publicity by the hoopla going on the Deepika being beheaded, everyone knows, a girl earning 78 crores a year and 43 bodyguards, and 7 bouncers 24*7 cant be harmed, let alone beheaded, specifically when all these bodyguards are well trained private commandos. What harm does it get to make a random statement to put a price on her head, of 10 20 or 400 crore, when no one is going to do it.

As far as artistic freedom is concerned, as a freelancer and an individual with his independent mind, I can say it with utmost certainity and am sure facts will also testify my opinion is that for so long as the written history of the world is available along with the scriptures, there has always been a ban on expression on anything that is not a part of popular culture, and people and kings and queens and the dictators in power has put a ban or restriction to objectionable free thought since time immemorial.

So whether it is Padmavati having a dream sex sequence with Khilji or title Sexy Durga, there will be people who have all the time in the world to put bounties on the heads of their creators. In the meantime, common people like us gasp for fresh air in the smog filled streets of New Delhi, trying to meet our ends meet and busy thinking about the long due gas and electricity bill…

rlrrBzjffggii
dying to release the pain it withold…

 

GOD – my ultimate star

the poet in me – how bad it could be,

but with courage in heart…. i post this draft

of a poem with inspiration in lack, i wrote a decade back….

 

I have always been in awe of his existence….

how he worked out things for me…..for instance.

 

Life for sure is a roller coaster ride…..

my sins from him i cant hide.

 

I wonder how he would laugh,when I act smart…..

but I thank him with all my heart….

 

I have committed a  hundred blunders…..

still I never felt he ever showered thunder…

 

How much I owe to him….I just cant express….

which often make me feel depress.

 

Life has always been great under his shade….

even when I walk on path with thorns laid.

 

He had been a teacher par excellence…..

I was the one who lacked brilliance.

 

Still he never lost hope…..

I was the one who was hard to cope.

 

25 years later, I feel grown ….

but without him,I shall HAVE drown…..

 

Words cant express my gratitude…..

I still haven’t changed my attitude.

 

You are my ultimate shoulder to cry …

till my eyes don’t get dry.

 

Thanks would be a small word…….!!!!!!!!!!! O’ LORD.

YOU ARE MY ULTIMATE STAR!!!!! O GOD….

DELHI DIARIES: the charm of old Delhi..

For quite a long time, the writer in me focused on politics and other issues on which I wanted to write to an extent that the traveler in me was lost for some time. To compensate for it, I am going to start a series of travel blogs covering the different parts of the capital of India – starting from old Delhi.

It is said that – “the older the city gets, the more charming it becomes.” hiding in its viel, a thousand secrets and a million of dreams. As you set to explore the city, the air you breath and the skyline tell you the journey of the city, with billions of footprints left on the roads so traveled and leaving a mark in the history  and stories to be foretold for the generations to come. Delhi is one such city – which has scars so deep and a charm so unique, you can’t come here and leave without praying to come back on its soil again.

A city more than thousand years old, a city been a witness to hundreds of battles and a city whose soil is filled with blood,lust,power, vengeance and love. A city with no match.The heart of the Delhi still holds the history intact. As you pass through the  rustic  and over-crowded roads of the old Delhi. You will feel the magic in the air. This part  of the city is more than thousand years old and been a power capital of Mughals for  a century before British invaded India. The architecture of  this place is a literal amalgamation of  Mughal and the Hindu with a mix  of European and colonial architecture.

The reason old Delhi is called as the walled city is because this is the part of the  original city walled by the Mughals to avoid invasions. It has 14 gates enclosing almost 2000 acres of lands that includes forts , landscaped gardens and all  markets and whatever the king’s required.  The gates still retain their names. The  main ones are kashmiri gate at north, Lahori gate at West and Ajmeri gate towards South. All these gate were surrounded by thick walls as tall as 26 feet kept invaders at bay.

Starting from the red fort, the almost literal centre of the city, I was enamoured by the magnitude of the structure. Entering the structure from the busy road going towards the market, it awed me more after i entered the structure, the reason being from outside it appears as it is just the front of red bricks and mughal architecture at its worst, as plain as an imagination of 3 day old kid.

 

The moment i entered i was struck the magnanimity and the beauty which seems missing from the outside. Built by the mughal king in 1645, it is a 4 century old structure, built on the banks of the river Yamuna. The huge arch gateways took me back to the history of royalty and epic grandeur. The fort is octagon in shape. The marble and the floral patterns inside including those at the public baths called as hammams and those public gathering halls called as diwan – i – aam and diwan – e -khas are example of fine arts of the time. The imperial apartments overlooking the river has been created to create an illusion of heaven as described in the Quran. The innermost part includes diwan i khas which was for private meetings of high importance which to my mind included nothing more than planning and plotting for military invasions of the next target.

Each and every part of the fort brings you closer to the history and make you feel the grandeur of royal life and help you estimate the wealth they have accumulated to create a residence circumscribing almost 30 acres. The courtyards are well maintained and green, as i walked out the fort with markets selling everything, from silk to elephant tusk, at least the shopkeepers claimed.

I moved towards one of the oldest markets in the country – the chandani chowk. There cannot be anything more crowded than the narrow lanes in the middle of the afternoon in any other part of the world. The market is famous for its food with more than 7 dozen delicacies available, that you will be spoilt for choice. From fine silk and zari and chicken muslin, to the electronic goods to furniture to leather goods, there is so much quantity, and if you have a good eye for fineness, you will find some quality stuff here as well. I kept myself busy with the food, from famous kababs at kareem to jalebis at famous eatery and dahi bhallas at Natraj corner.

In the middle of the bustling market, is the Shis Ganj – one of the holy sikh temple where the 9th guru of the sikh community was martyred by Mughal king Aurangzeb. I went inside and found the place a spiritual delight. The structure was all marble and the religious hymns were sung inside. The enchanting voices of the priests made me forget the worries of the outside world.

As I moved out and took an auto to the next destination Jama Masjid, again a must visit and paradise for architect lovers.

 

THE art of DISTRACTION

For quite sometime now, my blogs are more on general issues in society and related issues. You might be thinking the reason. Its not that I became aware of my social responsibility, but more so because of the 7865 reasons, I am not travelling much. I assure you as there are not any trips planned in next 2 months, what I will be cover would be my home city –  Delhi. See I am able to distract you from the genre I am writing i.e. POLITICS.

In the 7 decades after the independence.. no government has been as successful as the current one in distracting the public from the promises it made 40 months back. Not only the government is good in doing so, They are able to manage to keep the media shut by dictating the topics on which top journos debate – directly or indirectly.

For so long as they are able to manage to continue with the monologue the PM gave from the old radio discussing the rains and the floods in the same breath. And as long as the general public is happy being living in the bubble that everything is in control, we have to admit that Modi is good in keeping the decibels of rhetoric high.. and most probably will be able to get a second term as a PM to get himself in the list of only prime minister’s to get the second term… which at the moment only has two names- Nehru and Dr Manmohan Singh.

Be it demonetisation or surgical strikes, whatever action has been taken by the government, whatever the conclusion of that radical decisions be, the perception that is created in front of the citizens is if you question the decision, you probably are antinational . The entire episode of JNU prior to the state elections was a perfect eyewash which died down the moment elections were over..

Last but not the least, the appointment of a dalit President was also a distraction technique to move the attention from hundreds of dalits killed in the name of cow protection. The same is the case of appointment of vankiah Naidu as the vice president is to appease the South Indians in the mirth of upcoming elections down south. The most recent in this tokenism is the appointment of first full time Defence minister as a women in Nirmala Sitaraman in the cabinet reshuffle and Arun Jaitley saying she is equally competent. God knows in which world, being competent commerce minister is enough to get the Defence portfolio.

In between all the chaos, we the citizens of this country are successfully distracted by the government. We forgot the LPG prices have increased thrice in 3 years, the packet of biscuit cost 8 bucks more. The petrol prices are revised on quarterly basis.
Why are we blaming the government.. no one should question them as pointed by one of the comedians on you tube. Our soldiers are fighting on border.. can’t you just bear these small inconveniences?

Probably we can.. .

WAREHOUSE CAFE – a review..

In the heart of CP, this lounge cum bar sets itself apart, from the dozens of lounges in the area – be it ambience, lighting or the vast multi-cuisine menu. A rich ambience with great interiors, mellow lighting and good music is a perfect setting for enjoying food. The multilevel set up give you options for lavish bar on level 1, retro style leather sofas welcome you on level 2, along with live bands. Moreover, they have a comfortable casual terrace sitting on level 3, if you want a quite conversation with your companion. The view of central park from the terrace is amazing.

Coming to food, it gives plenty of choices- from cocktails and hard drinks, soups and salads to appetizers to sea food, and what not. The menu is exhaustive with more than 400 options to choose from various categories. The lounge offers American, Continental, Italian, North Indian and Asian. We started with a Mojito and Breezer. From the non veg. appetizers, we had chicken fries and shredded chicken with honey sprinkled over it, the chicken was tender and well cooked, served piping hot and tasted good.  They had vast variety of pizzas, so I ordered their specialty – bacon chicken was slow cooked to perfection with traditional condiments served hot, glazed with teriyaki sauce. Thai chicken grilled sandwich was well flavored with soya, black bean and red chilies. In the main course; we ordered prawn curry, which I realized was a mistake as curry had the flavor of mint, tamarind, green mango and mild coconut, which do not blend as a whole.  Paneer makhni and chicken curry along with pineapple yogurt and Rice was delectable and pleasant.

At the end, try outstanding Oreo biscuit and ice cream shakes, smoothies before you step out. Absolutely sinful!  You will drool over that old fashioned banana split!!!

My verdict:

Food         : 3.5

Décor       : 4

Service     : 4

Meal for 2: Rs 250020160131_161458

THE UNPUBLISHED ONE – a lost draft

She sat in the Starbucks cafe, sipping her coffee and staring out of the window. The blood stained knife lay next to her handbag, covered with her blue silk scarf….how drastically the life has changed in the past few hours is beyond her imagination. It’s something beyond her control, to avoid the situation that has led her to pick up a knife that she has not even used for the very purpose it is meant for,leave alone to kill.Thinking about the next step of the plan she is now plotting to evade the police,after all,one mistake does not mean that she will spend her entire youth in jail,and specifically when,she is not the actual culprit,what she has done was to protect her dignity and life.

Maya has always considered her family as her strength,but she wasn’t sure whether they would pass this litmus test of the trust,and belief in her.That night no one was at home,which wasn’t something unusual,as after her mother’s death,and her father’s retirement,who, for most part of the year keep travelling to their parental home in Pune and maternal home in Lucknow.His brother had went to Bangalore for his post graduation,from past 2 years.Life was going fine, before this unusual incident that took place 2 days back.

Maya has always been a gem of her parents eyes and darling of his only brother, Nikhil,who she loved more than anyone else in this world.She has been punished so many times and taken his blames on her,even after he had completed his high school.In return he loved and pampered her as a princess.Things were smooth till one fine day,the soul of the family left them away forever.Anita,her mom was the pillar of strength,but after her death,things changed and dinner table conversations stopped and all that family outings,as no one was there to plan it,neither the dinner,nor the outings.Nikhil completed the last year of his graduation and moved to Bangalore ,just to get out of the vacuum. his mom has created in that huge Duplex villa in the upscale Defence colony of Delhi.Maya had just completed her masters in fashion designing from the top fashion school in Delhi and had just started internship with one of the top designers of the country,when her mom died.
Anita died in an accident, at least it seemed to be an accident,from the surface.Everyone believed apart from Maya,because she knew that it wasn’t .Just few hours before her death,she called in regarding someone who came that morning to enquire about Maya at their residence.He was a familiar face although Anita didnt knew the name,it was Mayank,Maya’s ex-boyfriend,Mayank who broke more than 2 years back during her graduation.She never discussed about him but he had been to their place once or twice to drop her late at night.Anita told about his visit to Maya 3 hours before her death when she called her to warn her to stay alert.

That was her last call.Hours later,her dad called her to break the news of her death, a cylinder that blasted in their kitchen killed her.Everyone in the family believed that theory and post mortem did not detect any foul play,so it was easier for others to believe about the incident as an unfortunate accident,but none was aware of that unusual phone call and her boyfriends visit,that’s why she was not able to come to terms of her death as an accident.

She was sitting there,sipping the hot coffee and the revisiting all the events that has changed her life forever.She was just thinking of the places where she can dispose that blood stained knife,finally she felt the best place to dispose it must be out of the city.She was aware that it will be a risk as the police must be looking for the weapon through which the victim was killed,but she has to ensure that she didn’t get caught,after all….She being caught would be the final note in the destruction of the entire family.Her father being a heart patient would not be able to digest the news of her killing, rather murdering someone.His brother would go in depression,or probably commit suicide because of the guilt.

She thought of the idea of throwing that knife somewhere in the way to her maternal home in lucknow,so that no one will question her for going out of the city just after that murder as police was suspicious of her being associated with that murder in punjabi bagh, as Raj was her classmate during her masters years and was considered to be a good friend of Maya,and police wanted to call her for some regular enquiry to the police station,and she just said a clear “NO”,giving some random health reason.

She took a bus to Lucknow from the bus terminal after taking an auto from CP to bypass,as going through metro and security checking at bus stops was quite risky.She reached bypass at half past 7.Took a deluxe night bus to Lucknow,and left,she informed Nikhil about her trip to her maternal home and was very restrained in talking to him,as she felt that her phone might be tapped as she was there at the party at his friends place.She just said Nikhil,that she want a break from all these happening,so going to their aunt and will be back in a week.Before he would have said anything,she disconnected the call.

He was just wondering what should be done here,but maya was determined and confident of what should be done.She stopped at a food joint where bus stopped for refreshment,went to the loo,locked herself in,and washed the knife of all the blood,removed the blood stains and fingerprints,and dried it with a handkerchief,put it in a polybag and kept it back in her purse,and later threw it in the drain flowing nearby before boarding the bus again.She was sure that none can find the weapon now and was much relieved by the fact that she no longer carries the weapon of murder along with her.

Some time passed at her aunt’s place and she came back to delhi.Later she has to face the police,after coming back to delhi,as ignoring their calls further, could lead to their suspicion getting strong.She met the police and told them about her friendship with Raj,and how he has so much enemies because of her frank nature and his regular fights with college seniors and told them about his long time rivalry with 2 – 3 people in college,just to tick the needle of suspicion on them.Maya was never that evil but when it comes to save her family,she can go to any length.Her father accompanied her to the police station as he was back in city after the news.He was disturbed but did not knew the truth.

The case as usual because of no circumstantial evidence was going no where and finally come to a dead end till it was given to crime branch after few years…..by an appeal filed in High court by Rajs parents.In all those years life came to path and Maya got married and was today a leading fashion designer in the fashion circuit and Nikhil was also engaged to her long time girlfriend.Maya has not forgotten anything and the memories of Raj still haunt her,but ofcourse they have faded in the past 6 years,as she kept herself busy in work and her 3 year old baby daughter.

One fine day,she got a summon from the court as someone has put the blame of Raj’s death on her,who said that he saw her going upstairs with Raj just before the murder, and the news was spent in media as wildfire,because of her reputation in society.she visited court and hear the petition,got the best lawyer appointed to defend her,when everything seemed fine,why the hell , life has take her back to those faded memories,she told her lawyer the entire truth,after all,now she need someone to confide and she trusted the lawyer,Nalini Singh,her husband’s family friend for decades.

She told the entire story……”I was at his party,in a upscale hotel in Punjabi Bagh,where he has invited 16 people apart from her,which includes my ex boyfriend Mayank as well.The music was loud and everyone seemed drunk and after few drinks Raj started misbehaving with me and forced me to drink vodka and whisky,although I am a social drinker but he made me drink for the sake of our friendship and all,and sarcastically said that I don’t trust him.So I drank 3 shots of vodka along with other friends and then he took me to the 2nd floor of the hotel,where a room was booked by him,he took me inside on pretext of giving me a surprise and locked the room and started kissing me and misbehaved.I tried to run out of room but was so drunk to reach the door, he again forced him on me and I slapped him,that was the time Raj lost his calm and started abusing and tried to sexually assault me,I pushed him hard but cannot run towards the door as he fall in front of the door and blocked the way to the exit,so I locked myself in the attached bathroom of the same room,I have lost my phone somewhere downstairs,so cant call anyone.I was just waiting and praying for someone to come miraculously and save me.I came to my senses to some extent and the trauma helped me to come out of the effect of alcohol.

Raj was banging the door,and asking me to come out and face the consequences and told me about how her mother’s death was not an accident but he had killed her by paying the delivery guy to send the faulty cylinder to your place.He further said that he asked her mom for my hand and shown his desire to get married to me,but she clearly said no and threatened him to call the police and get him arrested.I was shocked,such truth coming at this moment,the effect of alcohol faded further and I came to complete senses,everything that seemed revolving earlier, because of the 3 shots of vodka and 5 pegs of whiskey came to standstill.Tears rolled through my eyes.

The lock of the bathroom was almost on the verge of getting broken,when i came to my senses and started looking for some escape and found a window in bathroom,I went to window,and opened it ,somehow and started shouting,as luck has planned it,someone was standing there and although he didn’t see me but when I started throwing the bath accessories like towel and soap bar from the window,one of the guys noticed it,It was none other than Mayank…He was there smoking a butt,and noticed me,and detecting something wrong,he started running to help me out.

In the mean time the lock broke,and Raj came inside and started slapping and beating me up,but I ran outside towards the room,after pushing me much harder than earlier.Raj also came behind me, but slipped on the bathroom floor,he started bleeding badly as he had hurt his head,as I tried to help him out by going close to him,he again grabbed me by my arm,and i was dumbstruck and I saw a knife in the fruit bowl,on the side table of the bed which i catch hold off,and attacked him on his arm and the second time on chest,and he let me off. I got off from there,took the knife along and ran out of the room,I only want to say at the end,Nalini, that he did not died of my attacks,but because of excessive bleeding from his head,that proves that I am innocent to a great extent,if not fully at least partially.What I did was nothing but self defence.

Mayank came there and dropped me at my place,and I narrated the whole story to him in the way,and he promised to not name me anywhere,and appreciated my bravery.I didn’t get the time to thank him for the help,nor i got the time to ask him why he visited my mom that day.He left the country never to return after few months”.

Nalini was happy that a women has stood up for her and as she has herself gone through the entire autopsy and postmortem reports,she knew,Maya is telling the truth,Maya was relieved as she felt light after confiding in her although she doesn’t know about her fate.

Nalini fought the case and within record 7 hearings,the case was closed after high court PRONOUNCING Raj’s death as an accident.

The life has come full circle as that’s how her mother’s well executed murder was termed as an accident.The world respected her for what she has done to save herself,and set an example in the society,that a women should not be afraid of self defence,and should not feel threatened by the warnings of dire consequences if they resisted their advances.

Tackling life – different perspective, views, priorities and motivation…

 

There have been times when you feel lost and aimless, things do not go down well, be it between people or seniors in school or college, friends stop talking and so many things happen in personal life when one is going through  teenage. The stress of board exams, the pressure from parents to excel and life going haywire in terms of relationships with friends, losing contact with best friends, and finding it difficult to start new relationships with new people in college, specifically when you move to a different city to pursue your graduation, apart from other physical changes that happen in that age group. The phase when  everything in life changes drastically.

Few weeks back, I attended a motivational lecture in my college, where I believe something I learnt about life, which will help me to look at life with a totally different view. The lecturer narrated a story, which you would find interesting as well as inspiring.

The motivation coach said, “When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember a  Jar and the 2 cups of coffee. He had a huge jar kept on the table along with some golf balls, pebbles, a glass filled with sand, and 2 cups of steaming coffee.

When the class began, he picked up a  large and empty  jar and started to fill it with golf balls.  He then asked the students if the jar was full. We  agreed, that it was.

He, then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.  The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.  He then asked us again if the jar was full. We agreed it was.

He, picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. The sand filled up everything else.  He asked once more if the jar was full. We  responded with a unanimous “yes.”

The coach then took the two cups of coffee from  the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively  filling the empty space between the sand. Everyone laughed.

He said, as the laughter subsided, ” I  want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things — your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions — things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else — the small stuff.

“If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or golf balls.  The same goes for life.  If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and ‘fix the disposal’.

Take care of the golf balls first — the things that really matter.  Set your priorities.  The rest is just sand.”

One of us raised his hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.  “I’m glad you asked.  It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

That was the shortest lecture I have ever attended, but what I learnt was priceless and made me feel motivated. It taught me about life works and how important the relationships and family are, and how we tend to ignore our family, friends in meeting our career goals and later while climbing the ladder of success, one should remember that parents and friends would there to support as firm pillar in times of need, not your office colleagues.future_quotes-wallpaper-1280x800